Sexual harassment - what does that mean?



One of my clients stopped by today, a devout Methodist, likely mid-seventies, she runs the local food bank in this community.  She was telling me about a conversation with her son about the social issue of this year:  Sexual harassment. A long time friend came up and gave him a big hug. Crystal and her son discussed whether that was sexual harassment.  Crystal’s point was an affectionate gesture between two people wasn’t harassment.  I’m in total agreement. 

She was missing the point while dismissing the real issue.  Her son had no financial power over his friend.  They have an affectionate and fond relationship.  I was hearing some pooh-poohing of the very concept of sexual harassment.  Crystal wondered why it took so long for some women to come forward.

“I hear you,” I said.  “That clouds the issue. Up until right now.”

I asked her if she’d every been sexually harassed. 

“Oh, no.  Of course not.”  She huffed.

“Because I have been.  By my employer who stalked me and turned up my doorstep drunk. I handled the situation and I never reported it because I knew full well who’d get fired.”  Me.

(As an aside: Let’s just think about this for a second:  the hot-shot male sales manager who brings in major revenue.  Or the low paid female clerk, easily replaced with an ever younger model.”  You figure it out.)

“Oh, well, that is totally different.”

“Yes it is.” 

She was anxious to get away from me.  I’m not expecting further conversation on this subject.

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