I like mine fried

I've been thinking about weeding my garden plot. It has a nice, sunny location and is much favored by numerous garter snakes. I was turning the soil last season and located many, MANY snake burrows, each one giving me a nasty turn even though I was protected by boots and wielding a long-handled implement.

So wondering if surprise burrows with sleeping snakes are in store for me this season brought to mind the following stories:

Story 1:

To: Tim

My fierce hunter Rosie killed a snake and brought it home for me. I wandered out to the lawn and immediately noticed the distinctive white underbelly of a dead reptile prominent on the green grass - then noticed the lovely tan diamond pattern on the other side. Yikes, a friggin rattlesnake. I kept hoping she'd eat the damn thing and relieve me of disposing of it - but no go.

She had a great deal of fun tossing the carcass in the air - it kept moving all over the place and I jumped and shrieked numerous times discovering it in a new location. I finally got the pitchfork out and cautiously (how silly, it was way dead) balanced it up on the tines and deposited it in the garbage.

Intellectually I know snakes are good - but they creep me out when I see one... No doubt having my brother put a live garter snake down my shirt 50 years ago permanently scarred my psyche.

I must admit leaving it out on the lawn longer than necessary hoping somebody would drop in for a visit and get a big start.

Got any snake stories?

Story 2
Response:

As a matter of fact I do.

We were on one of our earlier family camping trips. You know the family outings with teenagers that really don't want to be on a camping trip with their parents because it is not cool.

We were actually in your neighborhood on the Crooked River just downstream of the dam. I had been there before many times with my uncle, it is his favorite fishing hole. So, they have campsites, the kind where you actually put up tents to live in overnight. This seems so wrong now that I have discovered the Marriott.

Anyway we got over there just in time to set up camp just before dark. Jacob was out wandering the campground because it was almost too dark for much adventuring. Bear in mind he shares your love of snakes. He was about 4 campsites downstream and all of a sudden we heard him scream the big f---bomb. The rest of us went running down to find him pointing at a very large bull snake. I would guess it to be over 4 feet long and about 2 inches in diameter.

The good news is it was dead too. So being me, I decided to have some fun with it. I took it and wandered back towards camp trying to decide what to do with it. Then I had a revelation. I took it to the women's outhouse and coiled it up just outside the door. You would have been proud of the setup. I even had the head raised up in what might have been a striking position. I had to prop it up with a little rock and a twig. (editorial note: I appreciate that attention to detail!)

Since the outhouse was close to our campsite we had a good view of the next hour or so. I know we scared the sh*t out of at least 5 different women before one came along who was not afraid of snakes and discovered our little game.

We were laughing so hard it brought tears to my eyes. You would have been proud. (editorial note: yes, I was proud)

The good news is that this little joke brought us together for the weekend and we ended up having a very good family type trip.

That was the last camping trip we had as a family so I really enjoy the memories.

Tim Sly

(Tim has since passed away. I find it comforting to read his well-crafted stories. I miss that man.)